Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Erykah Badu's Window Seat Video

What did ya'll think of Erykah Badu's new video? I really liked it. She always has us thinking...It irritates me that some people can't see past her nudity. There is a message in the video people. I've always admired her for her ability to go against the norm & do her own thing. It's even harder when the norm looks at you crazy for doing something different. That alone takes real courage. I'm going through that right now....so I really identified with the video.

Check out her interview too with the Wall Street Journal...

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Take Off the Blues

Sorry we're so late posting! Long day... but....if you're up check out this song by Foreign Exchange (1/2 of Little Brother). It's called "Take Off the Blues."Our first dance at our wedding was to this song. Every time I hear it, it still makes me smile and do the dance steps. :-) Most likely, we will be posting a lot of FE & LB songs. We love them & a lot of people don't know about them. We just try to introduce people to music we like. I was just telling this girl on Twitter about our wedding song....so I thought I'd post it.


Monday, March 29, 2010

Home Ownership Motivation

(My finger is holding up the ripped part....)


It's no secret we want to buy a house this year. When I was working full-time, I kept this photo at my desk & one on the refrigerator at home. I printed the photo off of a home builder's website...can't remember which one. Gorgeous home. It made me so happy every time I looked at it. A relaxed happy feeling. It was & still is my motivation to one day own a home. Well, one of them. ;-)

Friday, March 26, 2010

Black Marriage Day 2010!

Guess what? Black Marriage Day is on March 28, 2010. (I apologize for posting this so late!)Founded by Nisa Muhammad, this Black Marriage Day seeks to celebrate black marriages around the world. I first read about it at http://www.blackandmarriedwithkids.com/ founded by Lamar & Ronnie Tyler. You can join in on the celebration by going to see their documentary You Saved Me, which will debut on BMD 2010 in 25 cities/300 communities across the United States. Lamar & Ronnie are setting out to debunk the myths that black marriages don't last. I love it. :-) You Saved Me offers a more in-dept look into the relationships of black marriages. Admission is just $10. Click here to see if it's playing near you.

(click to enlarge)


Check out the trailer below.





Last year, the dynamic couple released Happily Ever After, a documentary featuring African American couples recounting the trials and tribulations of marriage. I haven't seen it, but I'm dying too. I've heard so many great things about it ya'll.

Another way to spend BMD is by renewing your wedding vows! There will be local pastors on-site & you will have a chance to win Tyler Perry dvd sets & promotional items from your local radio stations. Admission to this is free. Check the list below to see if your city is listed. All you have to do is show up.

ATLANTA
Cumberland Mall
Atlanta, Georgia 30339
Sunday, March 28th at 1pm
Featuring John and Helen Carter
Georgia Family Council

CHICAGO
Sweet Holy Spirit Church
8621 S. South Chicago Ave
Chicago, IL 60617
Saturday, March 27th at 2pm
Featuring Yanni Brown
Kiss and Make Up Intimate Evenings

DALLAS
Friendship West Baptist Church
2020 West Wheatland Rd.
Dallas, TX 75232
Sunday, March 28th at 1pm
Featuring Helen Brown and James and Kimberly Bradley
Friendship West Baptist Church

DC
Union Temple Baptist Church
1225 W Street Southeast
Washington, DC 20020-5755
Sunday, March 28th at 1pm
Featuring Black Marriage Day Founder Nisa Muhammad
Wedded Bliss Foundation

PHILADELPHIA
The Moshulu
401 South Columbus Boulevard
Philadelphia, PA 19106
Sunday, March 28th at 12:30 – 2:00pm
Featuring Elder Rob Harrison
4Ever Marriages


Check here & here to find more great activities to commemorate BMD. The hubs and I will definitely be celebrating! :D



Have a great weekend!


Thursday, March 25, 2010

What $25 Buys You From The Grocery Store...



1. Pretzels

2. Loaf of bread

3. Fruit

4. Coca-Cola (I'm trying to give it up...so hard)

5. Ritz Honey Butter Crackers

6. Oreo Cakesters (blame Reign, lol)

7. Deli Fresh Chicken Breast

8. Little Debbie Cupcakes (blame me, lol)



Why are groceries so expensive? : \

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

If it Don’t Make Dollars, Then it Don’t Make Cents!


So KD and I had an argument recently. I will not go into the details of the argument (we’re not ready for you to know that part of our lives yet!) but to sum it all up, I was able to realize that my side of the story was driven by money even though money wasn’t the basis of our debate. Even though I already knew it, I had to explain to KD the root of my argument: During most of our disagreements (even ones unrelated to money) I’m subconsciously asking myself ‘Will it cost me money or will it make me money’? This is what men think about in addition to other things, and I will try to explain why.

See ladies, we don’t only think about sex…..

A lot of men’s concerns stem from money and the question of can we afford it? I first thought to tell a story to explain this, but my original story was pretty boring and didn’t make sense. So let’s hope my explanation is not worst than my stories.

When a guy is apprehensive in buying his significant other something expensive, it’s not that he doesn’t think you deserve it. The first thought for him is how much is invested and what he will get in return. In other words, what is his return on investment? Everybody wants a return on investment, but guys initially do not see any return on investment when spending money that may indirectly benefit him. Some guys may not see the benefit of decorating a house or having a lavish wedding. All he sees is how much money he will spend. But a guy does see the return on investment when just buying a house, or getting married to his soul mate.

This is not with just buying things; it could also include time invested. Guys do hold their time as valuable and do not want to waste time on anything that does not benefit them overall.

I will not explain further, I’m already getting bored reviewing this. But there are other examples, so let’s see if any other guys would like to chime in and give their two cents. Ladies? Have a rebuttal? Or do you understand and have a testimony?

I hope this gives a little insight in the minds of the man. To sum this all up, I leave with this: If you are arguing with your man about something, make an attempt to peek into his mind, and ask yourself some questions: Does he see a return on investment? If not, then how can I convince him there is one? Because what he is saying to himself is: “If it don’t make dollars, then it don’t make cents!”

Image courtesy of Instigator Blog

REIGN

Monday, March 22, 2010

So "The Game" TV Show Is Coming Back?!


A week ago while I was on Twitter Derwin, (I mean Pooch Hall), tweeted this....

Hey @hoseachanchez have u heard? I know I didn't hear what I think I heard? Hey girl @TiaMowry did you hear? Ill say THASSWASSUP! Finally!

Tia Mowry, aka Melanie, tweeted back happily calling him Derwin...

@pooch_dog ummmm yes sir!!! Uh oh.... That's wassup aka Derwin Davis. Let's go!!!

So of course I got all happy and started retweeting about The Game coming back. It's no secret that the hubs and I loved The Game. We really identified with Melanie and Derwin. I was extremely pissed when it was yanked off the air and I had hoped BET would pick it up....but they didn't. I was still reeling about Girlfriends....okay back on topic. So....guess what I read this morning??? :D


BET finally picked up The Game! They still have to work out the legal stuff with all of the actors, but I have my fingers crossed. I won't say another word until the first show airs.

Friday, March 19, 2010

We Both Think Alike



This is one of the songs that always reminds me of Reign & I....well really just the part Olivia sings. Hahaha

Note: We don't condone any of the things 50 Cent sings about in this song. I just like the part Olivia sings. :-) It kind of reminds me of the singing (Tisha Campbell's voice) in the Little Shop of Horrors.

Have a great weekend!


Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Did You Celebrate Your 6 Month Anniversary?


Recently, our 6 months of marriage passed by...We really didn't celebrate it, but I would have liked to. We were still getting settled into our apartment so we really didn't have time to do/plan anything. Reign doesn't think that the 6 month wedding anniversary should be celebrated because it's not yearly. So I looked up the definition of anniversary....

anniversary- 1. the yearly recurrence of the date of a past event
2. the celebration or commemoration of such a date

According to Wikipedia, anniversary is derived from the Latin word "anniversarius" which means turning yearly. So technically Reign is right in it not being a "real" anniversary according to Wikipedia and the first definition from dictionary.com. But......I'm going to go with the second definition. ;-) 6 months of marriage is just as monumental as the first full year. Shoot, it's half of a year! That's a big accomplishment in my opinion. I'm not saying every 6 months we should celebrate. Just the first 6 months....

What do you guys think? Did you celebrate your 6 month wedding anniversary?


Photo from Flickr

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Meet the World's Longest-Married Couple!


I know I'm a little late on this but....I wanted to post it anyway. Meet Herbert & Zelmyra Fisher, the world's longest living married couple. Herbert and Zelmyra, 104 and 102 years old respectively, were married in 1924 so that means they've been married for 85 years! They'll celebrate 86 years this May which means they're only a year away from having the longest-
marriage in history according to the The Sun.

Here's one of the questions asked & answered via twitter on Valentine's Day.

"What made you realize that you could spend the rest of your lives together? Were you scared at all?"

Herbert & Zelmyra: "With each day that passed, our relationship was more solid and secure. Divorce was NEVER an option - or even a thought."


They're done answering questions right now, but I'm going to keep their twitter as a reference. ;-) I'm hoping they'll come back and answer more questions! Wishful thinking....And we're following them. Go to twitter.com/longestmarried to follow them too! Reading their twitter advice was very comforting to me. I can tell that they are very much still in love with each other. I want us to have what they have. :-)


Monday, March 15, 2010

Babies? We Just Got Married!

Paula Patton & the hubs Robin Thicke waited 4 yrs before getting pregnant. They are expecting a little boy in May.

So here it is....I've only been married a hot minute and friends & family are already asking "when are ya'll going to have some babies?". Excuse me? We just got married. o_o Nothing against couples who had babies immediately after getting married (or before), but I want to enjoy just being with my husband (only) just a little bit before we had children. Just me & him like the Tony, Toni, Tone song...Am I selfish? Like Robin Thicke once told Essence,“We’re going to enjoy running around the world for a little bit; we’re going to get our “Sex and the City” on, then we’re going to have some children.” This is exactly how I feel!

I will admit that right after we got married, I wanted to throw caution to the wind & have a little k.d or reign. I'm in love with Reign and after we got married I felt closer than ever to him. Then, I had to look at the other side of it. Kids alter plans, decisions, jobs, MONEY, and a whole bunch of other stuff. I know that. The one thing I can't afford a child altering right now is our MONEY. We need that moola so they can have a yard to play in one day. I want to at least have some things in place before we bring a child into this world. And one of those "things" is a house. ;-)

The next time someone asks me when we're having kids, I'm going to say, "When we're ready to have kids, I'll let you know. Right now, we're getting our "Sex and the City" on!" lol!

Friday, March 12, 2010

What is the 80/20 Rule You Say?


I first heard the saying 80/20 for women in Why did I Get Married? It was a great concept. Before the movie, us guys would say ‘no woman is perfect’. That was the saying back then. But now here is my detailed perspective on what 80/20 means:

First, for those people still asking, “What is the 80/20 rule”? This basically means that you will get 80% (at the most) of what you want out of the woman you love/want to be with. So don’t bother reaching for that additional 20%, because again, nobody’s perfect. But then men go out and try to get that 20% and actually find it in another woman. Maybe men will cheat to get this, leave their significant other, or never commit at all because they love that 20% so much (or are just idiots…I’ll let you tell it). But then you lose all that good 80% lovin’…oops! I’ll stick to the G-rated version.

To me, that 20% could probably be physical attractiveness, the ability to control the woman, money, or anything that does not hold value in the long run. So what is the 80%? KD has 80% (I can argue she has even more…). She is smart, funny, has a great personality, great conversation, she supports anything positive I do, I know I can count on her for anything, and I know she will be a great mother!

Other things include her attractiveness (you a dime baby!!!), but I cannot control her and tell her what to do (although I wish I could….j/k) and us put together, we are zillions of dollar away from being rich (KD, I'm going to need you to make this happen!!). But the plus or minus 20% I do not have is OK, because I know what I would be losing, and who in their right mind would pick 20% or 80% anyway???

Now, you do have some men that do not want to commit, and they have their reason, so I would like to clear the airways: I’m not knocking you 20% guys, because truthfully, guys do want to continue to feel free and be able to do whatever they want to do whenever they want to do it and not have to worry about what a woman wants from them. But if you truly are able to find that 80% woman, you can still do what you want to do and be happy. But understand: you do have to honor the woman in your life and treat her they way she is suppose to be treated: like the number one person in your life. I have learned that. Have you? Or do you still want that 20%? For a different perspective, you can read this article.


REIGN

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Who Else is Going to See "Why Did I Get Married Too?"


I can NOT wait to go see this movie! Loved "Why Did I Get Married?" and I was just waiting on them to do a sequel to it....It's funny because in the first one I always wished that they had gone somewhere tropical. lol....And now in the sequel looks like their on a beach somewhere! Oh yeah! I love warm/HOT weather. I'm eager to see how their lives have all changed since the first one. If I had to pick one, I would say my favorite couple is Sheila (Jill Scott) and Troy (Lamman Rucker). I really liked how they fell in love & how she transformed into a new person. Mike (Richard T. Jones) , her ex-hubby is probably going to try and get her back in the sequel. He was like a sad puppy dog at the end of the first movie! That's what he gets.....80-20 ya'll...80-20...;-)


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If you haven't seen the trailer yet check it out here. You can even write a little entry about why you got married on there. I did!


It'll be in movie theaters April 2nd. Who else is excited? I'm thinking about having something like this with our friends who are couples...Does anyone else plan annual trips like this with their friends?


Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Were You Friends Before Dating?-K.D.'s View

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Brown Sugar- Dre & Sidney still at the just friends stage

K.D.'s View


I met Reign almost 10 years ago and we were both in relationships. Neither of us was interested in being with the other....we were just friends. Then one day I looked up and Reign was my best friend. :-) I had a few best friends at that time and he was one of them. He would always call me his "best female friend' which I thought was weird....lol.

In my past relationships before the hubs, 2 crucial things had to happen before I "went" with anyone. We had to be good friends first and I had to love you. I was serious and I wasn't playing. I made that rule up when I was in the 10th grade. That was when I encountered my first love. Most of my friends thought it was odd that I had to actually love the guy to be in a actual relationship. You have to know what YOU will deal with and what YOU won't. Other folks may not always agree with you, but you aren't living for them are you? Some people can like a person & start a relationship. There's nothing wrong with that. It's just not me. I didn't take dating lightly and I didn't date lightly. I dated for keeps. I believe I was always looking for my husband. So if I was going to say, "This is my boyfriend", then love not like would have to exist in my heart.


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That first kiss that changes the entire dynamics of the friendship... ;-)

Because Reign and I were best friends before even dating, I felt like we had a stronger more honest bond. I mean...I knew this guy. We didn't need a reason to kick it. I can't count how many nights I chilled at Keith's apartment eating pizza and watching Menace II Society. I loved being around him! I really did. :-) We'd been through a lot together as friends. I loved him deeply as a person. I knew his moods, his ways, likes, dislikes, past girls....everything. I didn't have to wait until we got past the newness so the real "him" could show up. He was already there-flaws and all. ;-) And I loved that about our relationship. I look at him now & I can't believe I've been knowing him all of these years. We were just reaching adult hood when we met & now we're grown (but still growing together) and married. He's my confidante. My was there with me at my worst times, been through some flat broke periods, i don't need makeup to impress him, i don't need that weave either, i would rather go through hard times with you than good times without you best friend. I'm so happy we found each other. This is truly the epitome of what Cicely Tyson talked about in Madea's Family Reunion.

So were you friends/best friends with your spouse before dating? If so, how did it affect your bond? If you weren't friends, how did that affect the relationship? I'm curious to see how the wheels turn in other folk's relationships.

Monday, March 8, 2010

How to Lose Your Free Pool Table



YOUNG....I just found out they are selling the pool table!!!!! WTF?!?!?! That's the reason I picked this apartment. Now what can I say is the best feature....the recessed lighting?!?!?! Yea right.....OK....I'm close to digressing....

I was really looking forward to playing pool. See, I really like playing pool, (among other things) and the idea of having the opportunity to play for free whenever I want then have it stripped away from is like them treating me like the white couple treated Richard Pryor and his family in the movie Moving!?!? For my guys out there, I know you understand my pain....KD has been gleaming all over since she heard the news...."More space"...yea yea yea....

So I have a couple of options here:

1) I can just play more frequently then I planned until they sell it

2) damage it so they have a hard time selling it....

3) flat out buy the joint

Aight....the truth of the matter is, and for those that know me, I'm too grown of a man to damage another person's property, so of course that was an option for the birds!!! So maybe I can just play more even if it means less PRECIOUS QT (more on that later) with the wifey. She'll understand right??? She understands I need to sharpen up on my pool skills before it's too late, right??

Oh, and what about option three you asked??? This thing weighs about as much as the house!!! I tried lifting it and I almost fainted while busting a vein. When I'm really ready to have a pool table, mine will be better! What would you expect from a Leo??? OK...(truthfully)...buying it would defeat the purpose of moving here in the first place. Now I digress....

REIGN

3 Reasons Why We Like Our New Basement Apartment

A month ago, Reign (the hubs) and I moved from our spacious 2 bedroom/1 den apartment to a smaller 1 bedroom basement apartment. I really miss our old apartment....We were there for 2 years so it holds a lot of memories for us. We're currently saving money for a home and moving basically chopped our rent in half. :-) I really didn't want to consider basement apartments because I didn't like the idea of living under someone. We've been living on our own for years now and I like the freedom of having my own living space you know?

We looked at some "not-cute" basement apartments before settling on this one. One in particular looked like it hadn't been renovated in 40 years. I swear the wall paper reminded me of the old tv show, "Mama's Family."

Anyway, the new place looks great. We're getting used to it....There are some modern features here that we've never had in a place and some nice additions to renting out a basement.


Here's my favorite feature.


I'm loving this recessed lighting.... just loving it. I hope we're able to get this in our new home.

And here's Reign's favorite feature.

It's the homeowner's pool table, but it's basically ours for now....haha.



And here's the feature we both like. :D

Maybe basement apartments aren't so bad after all...


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